Columnist QuotesRating Mail
Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. - Erma Bombeck
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(1 Votes)
A fool and his money are soon elected. - Will Rogers
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You can only be young once. But you can always be immature. - Dave Barry
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Dreams have only one owner at a time. That's why dreamers are lonely. - Erma Bombeck
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Children make your life important. - Erma Bombeck
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Parents are the bones on which children cut their teeth. - Peter Ustinov
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A difference of opinion is what makes horse racing and missionaries. - Will Rogers
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Being a hero is about the shortest-lived profession on earth. - Will Rogers
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As the leader of twelve apostles, even Jesus had more executive experience than Obama. - Ann Coulter
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Clinton's attempt to socialize healthcare was the second most disgusting thing he did in the oval office. I can't remember was the first thing was. - Ann Coulter
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Democrats always assure us that deterrence will work, but when the time comes to deter, they're against it. - Ann Coulter
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Democrats couldn't care less if people in Indiana hate them. But if Europeans curl their lips, liberals can't look at themselves in the mirror. - Ann Coulter
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Even Obama's staunchest supporters are starting to leave him. Last week Michelle Obama demanded to see a copy of his birth certificate. - Ann Coulter
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Four years of Jimmy Carter gave us two titanic Reagan landslides, peace and prosperity for eight blessed years - and even a third term for his feckless vice president, George H.W. Bush. - Ann Coulter
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I know Jesus Christ died for my sins, and that's all I really need to know. - Ann Coulter
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I love to engage in repartee with people who are stupider than I am. - Ann Coulter
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I might be in favor of national healthcare if it required all Democrats to get their heads examined. - Ann Coulter
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If a university official's letter accusing a speaker of having a proclivity to commit speech crimes before she's given the speech - which then leads to Facebook postings demanding that Ann Coulter be hurt, a massive riot and a police-ordered cancellation of the speech - is not hate speech, then there is no such thing as hate speech. - Ann Coulter
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If John Kerry had a dollar for every time he bragged about serving in Vietnam - oh wait, he does. - Ann Coulter
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If only Al Sharpton were around, Lincoln would have known he was a victim of racism. - Ann Coulter
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If the press really thinks Obama is Lincoln, they ought to treat him like they treated Bush, 'cause that's how they treated Lincoln. His critics compared Lincoln to an ape; they called him an illiterate baboon. - Ann Coulter
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If we're so cruel to minorities, why do they keep coming here? Why aren't they sneaking across the Mexican border to make their way to the Taliban? - Ann Coulter
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I'm not going to be lectured to. - Ann Coulter
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In fact Sarah Palin has created more jobs than Obama has. She created eleven jobs fact-checking at the AP just for the Palin autobiography. - Ann Coulter
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Ironically, since Obama was elected, for the first time in my life I'm sometimes not proud of my country. - Ann Coulter
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I've decided to cut out the part of the speech where I say anything nice about Democrats. - Ann Coulter
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Liberal soccer moms are precisely as likely to receive anthrax in the mail as to develop a capacity for linear thinking. - Ann Coulter
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Liberals are stalwart defenders of civil liberties - provided we're only talking about criminals. - Ann Coulter
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Liberals become indignant when you question their patriotism, but simultaneously work overtime to give terrorists a cushion for the next attack and laugh at dumb Americans who love their country and hate the enemy. - Ann Coulter
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Political debate with liberals is basically impossible in America today because liberals are calling names while conservatives are trying to make arguments. - Ann Coulter
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Taxes are like abortion, and not just because both are grotesque procedures supported by Democrats. You're for them or against them. Taxes go up or down; government raises taxes or lowers them. But Democrats will not let the words "abortion" or "tax hikes" pass their lips. - Ann Coulter
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The Democrats have no actual policy proposals of their own unless constant carping counts as a policy. - Ann Coulter
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The fact that a Republican is in the late Senator Kennedy's old seat probably must have him rolling in his grave, probably spilling his drink. - Ann Coulter
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The New York Times editorial page is like a Ouija board that has only three answers, no matter what the question. The answers are: higher taxes, more restrictions on political speech and stricter gun control. - Ann Coulter
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The really amazing part, to me, was when Florida made it into the Final Four, the Democrats didn't demand a recount. - Ann Coulter
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They've hit us and we've got to hit back hard, and I'm not just talking about the terrorists. - Ann Coulter
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Usually the nonsense liberals spout is kind of cute, but in wartime their instinctive idiocy is life-threatening. - Ann Coulter
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We don't want someone who will get 98 percent of the vote. We want someone who will get 51 percent of the vote. - Ann Coulter
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We should invade their countries, kill their leaders and convert them to Christianity. We weren't punctilious about locating and punishing only Hitler and his top officers. We carpet-bombed German cities; we killed civilians. That's war. And this is war. - Ann Coulter
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We've finally given liberals a war against fundamentalism, and they don't want to fight it. They would, except it would put them on the same side as the United States. - Ann Coulter
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When every one of your arguments is characterized an attempt to bring back slavery or resegregate lunch counters, it's a little hard to have any sort of productive debate. - Ann Coulter
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When we were at peace, Democrats wanted to raise taxes. Now there's a war, so Democrats want to raise taxes. When there was a surplus, Democrats wanted to raise taxes. Now that there is a mild recession, Democrats want to raise taxes. - Ann Coulter
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When you try to figure out what the religious right is, it ultimately comes down either to one man, Pat Robertson, or anyone who believes in a higher being and wants their taxes cut. - Ann Coulter
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Whenever a liberal begins a statement with 'I don't know which is more frightening,' you know the answer is going to be pretty clear. - Ann Coulter
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Whether they are defending the Soviet Union or bleating for Saddam Hussein, liberals are always against America. They are either traitors or idiots, and on the matter of America's self-preservation, the difference is irrelevant. - Ann Coulter
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While the form of treachery varies slightly from case to case, liberals always manage to take the position that most undermines American security. - Ann Coulter
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Why couldn't Obama have picked somebody respectable as his running mate, you know, like John Kerry did? - Ann Coulter
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All married couples should learn the art of battle as they should learn the art of making love. Good battle is objective and honest - never vicious or cruel. Good battle is healthy and constructive, and brings to a marriage the principles of equal partnership. - Ann Landers
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At every party there are two kinds of people - those who want to go home and those who don't. The trouble is, they are usually married to each other. - Ann Landers
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Class is the sure-footedness that comes with having proved you can meet life. - Ann Landers
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